Just Because

Oh, Blogger.

I've done this before and I'm not sure what happened why I stopped.  Life?  Work?  A combination of both?  After nearly a decade, I find myself doing something very millennial again.  

It's interesting that I used to write blogs because this was an anonymous space.  Where I'm another unknown face with an online handle and a lot of opinions.  Curiously, it seemed like a quieter place back then.  Like that small local cafe you hang out in that nobody knows.  Or that little corner in a public spot that just seems to be yours.  You can invite friends and/or strangers over when you feel social.  But it's a safe haven.  

Now, it's where everybody's at.  Social media has made the space open for everyone.  Suddenly, the local cafe is a tourist attraction with a Google map pin on it.  The public spot is now a little too crowded.  Friends and strangers are there even when you don't feel social.  

Maybe that's what happened.  The online space became trendy.  And I wasn't really a trendy person to begin with. 

I'm an introvert.  If that's a concept unknown to you, it only means that socializing requires energy for me.  As opposed to my extroverted friends, who gets energy from socializing.  There's a lot more to it than that, but it's probably the gist of it.  The quiet vs. loud description is just an easy way to differentiate the two.  Given that such interactions require energy out of me, an exponential number of socializing drains me.  And when I'm in the comfort of my own room going through multiple voices on an online platform, it's almost similar to being in a rowdy party for me.  It gets tiring.  

I'm not saying it's a bad thing.  Having virtual relations on top of the personal ones we maintain is now a norm.  You don't just see your friends for lunches and parties, you also chat with them on Whatsapp or Viber.  And you react to their photos on Facebook or Instagram.  You thumbs up it, heart it, smiley face it, and add a comment.  These aren't necessarily bad things.  They're interactions that foster your relationships.  It's just, personally, I'm okay with not having to do all of them.  Maybe just one or two.  Like lunch and Whatsapp.  I've managed to sustain the relationships that matter to me without having to exhaust all channels, anyway.  

That's also not saying that I don't browse through social media or use it, because I do.  I have a regular relationship with Twitter.  That seems to work for me, because I think some people need to shut up after 160 characters.  Even me.  

Aside from that, I'm aware that I can be very judgmental.  And social media is an open invitation to judge everybody.  For example, I can be a Grammar Nazi.  Blame it on training communication skills.  I was employed to catch grammatical errors and correct them.  After doing that for several years, it almost becomes second nature.

Yes, ladies and gentleman.  I'm a Hermione Granger.  In an annoying know-it-all way.  Not the cute Emma Watson way.  And I really do not want to live my life being such a judgmental b**** all the time, so I'll just avoid the invitation when the force isn't too strong.  


So, why am I here now?  

To be honest, I'm not completely sure.  Writing was the one thing I absolutely loved and excelled at when I was younger.  I thought I would always write.  Now, I just compose emails and 160 character tweets.  Maybe I'd like to change that.  What do I want to get out of this?  I really don't know.  I haven't even thought about what I'd like this blog to be about.  Bloggers used to have a specific topic.  Like in a paper or magazine, you have designations.  You have news writers and feature writers.  Those rules don't seem to apply in blogging.  So, maybe I won't even have a theme.  Just talk about things I want to write about.  Just because.